Despite the facts that, during the past few decades, there has been compelling evidence to suggest a serious relationship between cigarette smoking and various life- threatening diseases; and the Surgeon General’s Office has confirmed that that nicotine found in cigarettes and other tobacco products is a dangerous and addictive drug comparable to morphine or heroin, 50 million Americans continue to smoke! Really! Do all these people have a death wish?
For sure, many individuals are flirting with poor health. They are out of control– like a runaway train; or a game of “Russian Roulette.” Sometimes when you pull the trigger you get the bullet… and you lose. On the average, 320,000 people per year lose their lives as a result of smoking. Most people try repeatedly to stop smoking. As a therapist, I have encountered many of those who have successfully stopped…hundreds of times! These individuals have mastered the art of “looping”–starting, stopping and starting again. As a result, they often feel out of control, frustrated, a prisoner of their habit and thus with each failed attempt, less motivated to try again. They are riding the roller coaster of doom.
In order to learn new ways to eliminate smoking, it is important to understand “how you know” to smoke. The assumption here is that smoking is something one uses to accomplish an intention– some end; it takes you from one state of consciousness to another. If you are a smoker, begin by asking yourself what smoking gets you?
- Relaxation? Some people believe smoking reduces anxiety, from a variety of sources during their day, and helps them feel more relaxed.
- Acceptance? There are those individuals who utilize smoking to maintain poise and control during social situations. It acts as a “buffer” to dilute some of the intensity of a particular interaction, so that an otherwise discomforting state can be made comfortable.
- Independence? Smoking may be a way to be assertive with family or friends. Despite their best intentions, concerns and logical arguments, one can still maintain control by continuing to smoke.
- Deep Breathing? For others, smoking represents the only time during a day when they breathe deeply; an important need for all of us.
For many people. smoking satisfies a combination of these purposes at different times.
Next, ask yourself, “How you know when to smoke?” Specifically, what were you experiencing, inside, just before you lit up a cigarette? Was it a feeling? Mental picture? Voice? This becomes the signal or “trigger” that informs you its time to go from one state (i.e. “anxiety”) to another (i.e. “relaxation”) through smoking. Pay attention to your triggers. In these considerations, as smoking is something used to accomplish the intention (mentioned previously), it is presupposed that one is exerting “control” when lighting a cigarette; rather than the more popular belief that smoking is a habit which represents a lack of control.
This being the case, one can then reason, “What other activities within my control would accomplish the same intention that smoking does?” How else could you achieve a state of poise during a social interaction? Perhaps chewing gum, dissolving a hard candy, changing your body position, tone of voice, rate of breathing; or perhaps you might try entering that situation “cold-turkey”, without any sort of buffer and pay attention to what happens. What could you do instead of smoking to demonstrate a sense of independence with family members, short of shortening your lifespan with cigarettes? How else can you reduce anxiety and relax? Could you practice breathing deeply while stretching instead of smoking?
Now comes the bargain: For one week, decide to substitute these behaviors for cigarettes at times when you would ordinarily smoke, in order to achieve the desired intention.
Find new ways to head where you want…and get off your butts!
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